Dear Senior,

No, you're not supposed to have it all figured out

photo credit to pinterest

“So, what’s next?”

I always subconsciously brace myself when I hear those words. If I could count the times I’ve been asked that in the last week alone? Well, I’d be counting for a long time.

But it’s really not a bad question. After all, I’m graduating from high school in a few weeks. I’ve done the minimum and gotten my high school diploma. For the first time in my life, I get to start calling the shots.

Am I going to college? Where will I work? What will I do?

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining that people ask me what I’m doing next, even if I am getting a little tired of it.

It’s a loving question coming from caring people. People who are invested in me and my life. I value that, and I value them.

But I hate to break it to you all: I just don’t have it figured out yet.

So, I always give everyone a version of the same noncommittal reply.

“I’ve looked at some colleges but they’re really expensive and I don’t want to go into debt. I’m not sure that a college degree would even really help me pursue my goals anyway. So I’ll work for a while and save and see where the Lord leads me next.”

Sometimes people nod and smile and tell me that I’m wise beyond my years. And sometimes…people look at me like they’re sure I’m going to rot in my parent’s basement forever.

“WHAT?! You aren’t going to college?”

“Eh, I don’t know. I’d kinda like to. But I’d kinda not. I don’t know yet. I haven’t decided.”

“But you SHOULD have decided! You’re graduating!”

graduation caps being thrown carelessly into the air. I can’t wait to do this. also, photo credit to pinterest again.

Let’s Talk About Magic Numbers

Our society seems to view eighteen/high school graduation as a magic number. You reach one of the two (or both) and you’re suddenly expected to have it all figured out. Where you’re going to college. What you’re going for.

The thing is, part of that expectation is good. Once you reach a certain age, you need to be displaying self-motivation and a desire to achieve and accomplish so that you can become an independent person. That’s just what it means to grow up.

It’s just unfortunate that the cultural expectation of a senior’s “maturity” seems so often to manifest itself in…well, college as being the only option.

A lot of young people graduated high school not having direction on what was next for them. So, they did what everyone else did. They went to college. They took out thousands in student loans, only to get degrees that they didn’t end up using, or sometimes even liking. I think they would tell you that they wish they could go back and do things differently. I think they wish that they had waited longer, pursued a different form of learning, or just gone straight into the workforce.

I don’t want to just dog on college here. There are so many amazing, cool things about college. But we have to learn that it isn’t for everyone.

Like them, I don’t have my goals figured out yet.

What’s even crazier, I don’t think I’m necessarily supposed to (and that goes for all the other seniors reading these words!)

But I’m working on it.

And that’s the key to the problem.

I may not have made sense of what steps I’ll be taking in the near future. But I’m going to keep walking forward.

I might stumble around a bit, but at least I’m moving.

Motivation and maturity do not have to manifest in a college degree, or an internship, or a good job right off the post-graduation bat.

They manifest in a desire-turned-action that lead to personal growth and responsible work.

Keep Walking Forward (Even When You Can’t See What’s In Front of You)

The next “right thing” is not college tours, scholarship programs, and applications. Those are good things. But they might not be THE thing. And that’s okay.

Yes, you may be eighteen now. You may be wearing the cap, throwing the party, and walking across that stage.

But that doesn’t mean you have your life figured out yet. And that’s not a bad thing.

Do you know what’s next?

If you do, that’s awesome. It’s so cool that you have that direction in your life. Pursue those goals! Do your work and do it well!

But maybe you’re like me. Maybe you don’t know what you’re supposed to do next or what it will look like.

You shouldn’t feel guilty about that.

Colleges and internships aren’t the magic medicine to keep you from becoming that codependent adult in mommy and daddy’s basement.

The key to being a responsible person is simply to BE one. That character trait doesn’t show itself in only one way.

Trust His Process (Not Yours)

I hate to break it to all the professors and intellectuals out there, but when God created the world He didn’t decree college as a necessary way of life.

In fact, college hasn’t been a cultural expectation until the last century or so. Maybe even less.

God doesn’t need to use college to lead you to where you’re called to be.

Maybe He will. He often does, with lots of people. But He doesn’t need to.

So if you don’t believe you’re meant to go to college, then don’t go.

Instead, keep walking forward, even when you don’t know what’s next. Work hard. Try things. Fail at things. But keep doing them.

Take the risk to do what you have been called to do, even when it looks different from what most people are pursuing.

Have the faith to follow God’s path for your life, no matter what that cost may be.

My Message To You (As a Fellow Senior Trying to Make Sense of Things)

Seniors, stop beating yourself up for not knowing what’s next. It may be that you’re not supposed to know.

And, if you don’t know what’s next, then start working on discerning where you're meant to go.

But don’t ever forget to walk by faith. He’s got you. He’s got all of us, no matter what.

It’s not up to you to figure your life out.

It’s up to your Heavenly Father to lead you the right way.

If you know what’s good for you, you’ll follow Him.

Yeah, maybe you’ll go to college.

And maybe you won’t.

Either way, with Christ as your center, whatever you do is going to be worth it.